Do you think my boyfriend will quit smoking?He promised me he would quit in August of 2009. Here we are 5 months later and not only hasn't he quit but I have seen no signs of progress at all. i didn't pressure him to quit, he chose to make that promise on his own. Do you guys think he was sincere about that promise and really will quit or if he hasn't yet he never will?
Patrick
Pressure him. If he loves you, he'll quit.
Ryan
Regardless of what anyone says here, he won't quit until he WANTS to quit. If you pressure him, he won't. If you threaten him, he won't. He has to want to quit for himself and for his own reasons.
Kayleigh
He may want to quit but smokers get addicted to nicotine. So, at this point even though he has not quit, has he even done anything to show he has intentions (like getting the patch, nicotine gum etc?). Because if he hasn't even taken a small step like that then he really has no intention of kicking the habit.
xxmusicxx
Overcoming an addiction is a long, tedious, stressful and sometimes a painful process.
Basically what he needs to do (if he hasn't done so already) is to cut back on each day (limit himself from 4 smokes a day to 3 smokes a day) and to lower the usage every few weeks/month.
It is helpful too if he seeks counseling, which can help him through the great deal of stress. This stress that I talk about, it is not caused by you. Since he has nothing to "calm him down," the withdrawal from the cigarettes are causing him the stress.
Try introducing some new hobbies/activities for him to take up, which will be a new release/escape that will replace the smoking. Some hobbies/activities can be: making toy models (model planes), knitting (maybe not "manly" but hey, you never know what may work and what he may like), working out, taking a walk after every dinner/on Saturdays (any other times works best too), playing the guitar, painting, wood working, gardening, golfing, bowling, etc. The quitting process can be easier for him if he finds something else to do, something that will take his mind off things (mainly the withdrawal) and taking up a new activity that can be a source to cope with stress (or whatever purpose he finds smoking does for him). However, I do suggest that you should pressure him to find an activity. Suggest to do a few together, and let him see what works best for him and what he enjoys doing as well.
Also, you may want to consider any factors in his environment. In order for him to completely quit smoking, he must move from his environment that causes him to smoke. If he knows what causes him to smoke, then he should leave it behind him and try to escape it by all means. For some people, it's where they are living. If there has been a lot of stuff that has happened to them at that location, they are most likely getting a negative vibe from the place, which thus causes negative behavior, which in your boyfriend's case, is smoking. The solution to the place of living, is to move to another place. The new place doesn't have to be far away, but sometimes it is more helpful to others for them to move far away. There could be a chance that his job could be causing this negative behavior, or perhaps someone in his life could be causing this. Now it is best not to jump to conclusions, because there could be a multiple things that triggers him to smoke, which is okay and normal. The best thing to do is for him to seek help from a therapist/counselor, where they can help guide him through a successful smoke-free lifestyle. A professional can see exactly how something triggers your boyfriend to smoke, and how much coaching they will need to give him depending on his addiction/behavior and nonetheless, his progress.
I would suggest talking to your boyfriend about the smoking. You can ask him, "Is it hard to quit?" and just try to get a sense of how he is feeling about the situation. You can try suggesting him to see a counselor, if he wants to end this quitting process quicker. He could reject the idea of seeking help, but there could be a chance where he is willing to try almost anything in order for him to stop.
telwidit
Actually no! And, that's too bad. The chances are that he won't stop smoking til he feels the negative effects of nicotine use. I can promise you all day long that I will stop smoking and drinking and cussing and continue all three. It's easy! I did it all my life.
Now I have COPD an upper respiratory infection that simply won't heal and of course means the ends of me.
Maybe this little missive will help him see the light, but I doubt it.
thanks
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